And thus we arrive at the yearly "game the 49ers are not expected to win in which they are nearly double digit underdogs and playing on the east coast". Along with this annual event comes my annual PLEA with this team: I know you are not good this year, this much is obvious. I know you're not wining the Super Bowl, or even making a playoff run. Sure, you might sneak into the playoffs as an 8-8 team because the 2011 NFC west is quickly challenging the 2010 NFC west to become the worst division in NFL history, but who are we kidding? You suck. You might suck a little less than the rest of this division, but you sucky suck suck just the same.
But here's the thing: PLENTY OF OTHER TEAMS THAT SUCK WIN GAMES THEY'RE NOT SUPPOSED TO WIN EVERY ONCE IN AWHILE! How about you do that, guys? Isn't it embarrassing for you that you haven't won one single game you weren't supposed to win in nearly 10 years? TEN YEARS! The last time the 49ers won a game they were supposed to lose, the Patriots were a 1 year wonder. Gas was 1.36 a gallon. Jeff Garcia was throwing to Terrell Owens, and Chris Collinsworth was a bad announcer! Does anyone remember just how bad Collinsworth used to be? That guy is probably the best color commentator on TV right now, and he used to be worst guy in a booth that also included Joe Buck and Troy Aikman. Seriously.
Point is, it's been a looooooooooooooong effing time since this team has exceeded even extremely low expectations: win one game during one season that you were not supposed to win. Show up, look like a real NFL team, and outplay another real NFL team. I beg of you. Give me this one win that I can feel good about when you go 7-9. At least give me this one week that I can look back on and go "Sure, this season wasn't great, but remember when they beat the Eagles on the east coast?! That was awesome!"
Last year it was Green Bay, before that it was Minnesota, New Orleans, and Pittsburgh. And this team laid down at every opportunity to surprise us as fans and the media at large throughout the country. I want the kind of win that makes the guys on football night in america go "Wow, 49ers! Who saw that coming?!".
This year it's Philadelphia, you a-holes. WIN THE GAME YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO LOSE!! Give us fans who have slavishly watched 90% of your games during this last ridiculous stretch of historical ineptness one tiny sliver of redemption! WIN THIS EFFING GAME.
