Thursday, January 16, 2014

The Center Cannot Hold

Look, I moved on from football team discussion board/comment section shitshows a long time ago. I'm not proud of the surely-ignorant text I'd shoot across the internets, but it could be fun at times, and even satisfying.

In my time, it was Packers, Rams, and maybe Dallas fans. Mixed in with the two or three truly psychotic trolls, you could catch a glimpse that most of those people were just like you: bored at work, in the mood for a little passive/aggressive (or just straight aggressive) behavior to blow off some steam, and willing to let it go at the appropriate time.

And this is in addition to the usual inside banter. You know, the dissection of your team, your player, or your (god forbid) mock draft with other like-minded folks. It could get a little heated, because it seems like everyone online is on edge all the time (that's a discussion for another time), and there could be some pretension, with IT guys talking blocking angles and contain (not that there's anything wrong with that).

But have you seen these fucking Seahawk fans? It's one thing to be confident in your team, and wholly another to have no sense of shame, no fear that your team might screw up (this is the truly insane aspect), and no empathy (sociopathy at its finest!).

I've seen no meaner, conscience-less, full-asshole humans than these Seattle fans commenting on your usual championship-week articles.

Yes, I still read the comments.

Have you seen the Russell Wilson thing?


This is truly the work of an asshole. Aside from the strong scent of a gay-porn cover in that first Wilson picture, isn't it unconscionable to demonize what appears to be a good kid from a non-traditional family background? To simply ignore his good works in the name of (not even good) Seahawk propaganda? 

And you add these coded pictures (look, Kaepernick is urban) to the utter bullshit about tattoos and backwards hats, well, fuck whoever made this, you're an awful human. And really, that's my point. In 2014, Seattle Seahawks fans, for the most part, are awful humans. Their lack of humanity defines them the same way purpose-built architecture defines their 12th man. Or something.

Go Niners. Defeat these fluorescent enemies in the name goodness, kindness, and humility. 

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And seriously, how can you not just hate the Wilson portrayed as a fucking veritable Dudley Do-Right. Who could root for THAT guy? It's worse than Kurt Warner and his bible verses, or Bret Favre and his folksy dick pix.